Sensory issues for tonight and autism

Well, as we all know tonight is the night that parents on the spectrum dread. All the fireworks that will be going off because it's a celebration. Well to me I'm not celebrating the new year. I haven't in all the times that Doodle has flipped her wig because of the booms and the bangs that go along with the celebration. If you have a child on the spectrum that fears the fireworks you know my feelings. The best way to combat this is to make sure that your child has everything that you need to keep sane.

Have your melatonin on hand so that your child won't have trouble getting to sleep from their shear terror. If your child has medication for anxiety make sure that it is filled and ready to go. Doodle is not on any medications. I refuse to drug my child with pharmaceutical drugs. Some parents swear by them however I'm not one of them. I swear by essential oils. Frankincense is my go to oil when I'm feeling stressed or a little under the weather. It's like prozac but in a healthier form. All I have to do is smell it and I become calm and relaxed. It's an instant booster!

Make sure that you have your ear plugs, ear muffs or noise drowning head phones ready. These do make sensory issues with sound bearable. Muffled booms and bangs are easier for a child on the spectrum to deal with.

Also make sure that you have your child's favorite anything handy. Doodle's go to toy is an Ojo doll from Bear in the Big Blue House. This stuffed animal has been with her through all of her surgeries. I am thankful that she has a doll that she holds to tightly through scary situations in life. And also make sure that you have favorite pajama's and underwear and their favorite blanket handy and ready for the night to get through.

Remember tackle the sensory issues first. Sensory issues are what are going to be causing the tantrums and meltdowns. Tackle those and you'll have a smooth night with no problems.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

We don't like you and autism

So what do you do when you are out for break from school. You play outside of course. It's Christmas day and she's really enjoying her day with her new toys. What child doesn't? During the afternoon it was time to play outside. Lunch was picking at her food, which is normal. That doesn't bother me and I will explain why in a later post. this post is what I got to hear with my own ears from next door.

Doodle gets bored with her toys sometimes and trying to limit time on the ipad is key to me. She needs to play outside and have that fresh air. The rain was heading our way, the dark clouds were rolling in. Get the playtime in while you can.

When Doodle climbed into her trampoline that's when I heard those dreaded words. Words that hurt kids feelings and for others like Doodle have trouble figuring out why. She was jumping laughing and clapping having a good ol' time when out from the next yard came 3 kids about Doodle's age scream out, "We don't like you! Hey you! We don't like you!" Well this caught Doodle's attention and she stopped her jumping walked over to net closest to the offending yard and yelled back, "What?"

And with her question they started again, "We don't like you!" Again, Doodle replied back, "What?"

At this moment I had to intervene. She was enjoying herself in our yard. Why should her fun be interrupted by such hurtful words. If I had it in me my blood would have been boiling. I would have jumped that fence chased after those children and tried my best at terrifying them. Letting their parents, grandparents and or guardians to know how despicable they were for teaching their children to hate others. But that is not me nor is it my way. I only speak up when I see a child being beat up or in a fight. That's the time to intervene. Not now. 

Every opportunity in this big scary world is an opportunity to teach. And she needed to learn what to do. I looked up from my library book and calmly stated, "Go back to jumping baby. Ignore them they aren't saying anything important or nice." And with that she went back to jumping. She was having a blast and I'm not going to let someone else shatter her laughter. She had 30 more minutes of outside play, taunting children in the background and I'm proud that she held her own and did as I requested and ignored the little snot heads. It's flu season they could have had snot.

Surviving Autism

What do you really need to survive autism? Well, a lot of prayers to start off with. Remember I'm a Jesus freak! And on the serious side, children on the spectrum like to stem. Don't stop them from stemming. it helps them cope. And yes there is a "time and place for stemming".

You know that song, You spin me right round baby right round. Yeah well that pretty much sums up autism for me. Spinning is one of the coping stems that is Doodle's go to stem. So I made her a swing. You know the swing. The ones that you can find all around in your childhood. The rope and board swing. My swings are made out of 550 cord. You can also use the 550 cord to make survival bracelets. Yes that's the cord I use for the swing. And can Doodle get some height on that one. She will sit down and twist, twist, twist and twist until she gets the cord where she wants it and lift her feet off the ground. The excitement as she spins the uncontrollable giggles and squeals. This is something that she could do for hours if I allow her too. And the best part is this type of swing can be set up anywhere at anytime. Love the stemming swings!

Next up is the trampoline. Whether it's a small trampoline or a large trampoline you need to have a trampoline. Jumping is another form of stemming. Remember that stemming means to self sooth when they are in sensory overload. This is another thing that Doodle likes to do when she's not in the mood to spin. Jumping is a repetitive behavior. It means that it can be done over and over and over again. And who am I to stop that one. I used to have a small trampoline in the house and large one on the outside. Now I just have the larger trampoline outside. If you're thinking that this is one of those things that are way out of your budget try checking your local craigslist ads. They almost always have trampolines for sale and in many cases ones that have only been used once or twice by kids and then left to the way side.

And exercise ball. These overly large balls that hold our weight while we do our sit ups on the trying our hardest not to fall off. Yeah those. Rolling back and forth on one of these exercise balls is the best way to stem during a meltdown.

Play sand. Yes you heard me correctly. Play sand is something that I use as a diversion or redirection. If a meltdown is coming one I use sand. But not just any play sand. Yeah outside play sand is great for outside but what about a rainy day when your stuck indoors and your sand is outside. Well you can use a small plastic tub with some sand in it or you can you kinetic sand. Michaels craft store actually sells this stuff and it is heaven! For different types of sand you might want to work with or learn more about for your child on the spectrum I highly suggest this video from Lucky Penny Shop:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uG8UkempW6k You can actually find lots of great things for your child that you might want to try on Lucky Penny Shop. As LPS Dave likes to test out a lot of toys and yes I mean a lot of toys.

The very last thing in your arsenal should be an ipad or tablet. Can't afford one? Try your local pawn shop. And at some pawn shops you can even do layaway. I got Doodle a tablet from a pawn shop for about $150.00. It has the android app. Bet thing for me is there are a lot of autism learning apps on the droid market. Things you won't find on the ios market. Doodle actually learned all the different emotions that we as humans go through. That's a hard concept for some children on the spectrum, understanding facial expressions. Now she knows understands when I'm happy, sad, mad or excited. You can't teach 24/7 or even for a full 8 hours a day and there is so much information that children on the spectrum need to know. Let technology help you with that. If you're saying but I can do it. Be prepared! It takes a child on the spectrum to do something or be told how to do something over a 1000 times before they get it. Are you really that prepared?

These are all the key essentials to helping your child with ASD. Have fun!

Anticipation with Autism - Yeah that really happened

There are many days you will see break through and days you won't. The days with the break through are the ones where you want to throw and instant party. Dancing in the streets excitement. One of Doodle's most hated places to be is the library. Why doesn't she like library's? It's a sensory thing. The lighting usually gets to her. There are some sections in a library that are dimly lit and those are the ones that usually put her in sensory overload where she just freezes up, forgets to stay focused and acts like the wild child.

Me, I love the library. It's like a second home to me. All the knowledge and information that can be found on shelves throughout this wondrous place is awe inspiring to me. It's true the saying of all the places you can go! So it seems logical that the main place that Doodle needed to learn to handle her autism is at the public library.

I try to take her to the library at least once a month. It's off the regular schedule. But then again so is a school holiday so we really can't do a weekend schedule. The front foyer of the library is the one and only place that is dimly lit. So it's one of those sections I try to rush through as quickly as possible since we stand there the longest when we get ready to leave.

After a quick 30 minute search through the library for new books that beg to be read, it was time to leave. And the long wait to be checked out began. Luckily for me there was no one in front of us. The problem for me was Doodle wanted to kick off and start running around using her outside voice. Yep, the wild child had returned and it was going to be a short visit as far as I was concerned.

I promptly called her by name and said, "You need to come stand beside mommy and wait patiently like the good girl that you are." She happily skipped up to me and looked right at my face and replied, "With anticipation?" This put me over the moon. It's one of the mile stones I have been waiting for. Never knew I was waiting for it and it's a progression in her autism that I can dance in the street for. How wonderful of her to use that big of a word for such a small little girl and only in the third grade!

Embrace the happy moments in your life. Sometimes that seem so small in comparison but to other parents who have children on the spectrum it's a biggy!

To hell and back with Autism

Yeah this post is exactly as it reads. About going to hell and back. I'm an entrepreneur through and through. I love it. It affords me the opportunity to be there for my child whenever Doodle needs me. Whether it be from sickness, doctor's appointments, field trips, you name it I drop everything at a moments notice to take care of her.

I've been through hell in what was my marriage and yeah I put up with a lot of verbal abuse. Knowing that I should have never taken it. Realized that one when Doodle was calling me stupid. And when I would cry she was comforting. Don't cry momma, you're beautiful. The stupid is what was like a dagger to the heart. I heard enough of that out of her father during almost 13 years of marriage. And out of my husbands mother I heard enough of how I wasn't good enough for her son or his children from his previous marriage. And since I was taking care of my mother in law who had Parkinson's, Doodle with her autism, my husbands children from his previous marriage as he had full custody and my husband who made the Army his career. I thought I was enduring all the verbal abuse because I loved him. No, I was taking it because I was allowing myself to be weak.

I don't hear much from Doodle's father anymore and frankly I like it better that way. I am the woman I used to be. Carefree taking care of myself. Well, not only myself but Doodle as well. And we have plenty of help. The Lord promises us that he will collect our tears in a vessel. And believe me that is one huge vessel that collected my tears. I'm stronger. Not in the physical sense but in the mental sense. I have my power back.

The reason that I am writing about all of this right now is because in 2015 I will not be taking this baggage with me. I'm dropping it off here. Along with the way he dropped his wife and his special needs child. In an message on my ipad. Thanks for the text stating that I was not allowed to come back home. And right after I had left my best friends mother's funeral.

And just like when Doodle was diagnosed, don't feel sorry for me. I already have a father on earth and a father in Heaven. I don't need 2 fathers on earth. One cheering for me to succeed and one hoping that I fail refusing to let me go anywhere. Acting as if he is the best thing that ever happened to me. Um, no the best thing that ever happened to me was when I met Jesus Christ and accepted him in my heart as my Lord and Savior. I can hold my head up high and no longer have the fake smile on my face. Yeah I'm still known as Smiley by my new friends down here but now I smile because I'm happy in life and happy to see my friends cause I know we will be laughing and having a good time waiting on the kids to get out of school.

My friend used to tell me that God doesn't want me in bondage and my marriage was bondage. And that's why my business was not as successful as it should have been. Now it's a new day and a new time. I know what's important and what isn't. If it's not my businesses or my immediate family who took me in to keep Doodle and I from being homeless, it doesn't matter to me. And yes I said businesses because I consider the video show I do with my best friend a business. My publishing company is slowing rising out of the ashes like a phoenix. I do a purse and jewelry business with my best friend and yes I even sell weight loss products. If you are trying to be an entrepreneur you need to have at least 2 businesses other then the business that you created. WHY? That's just too much to handle. You need a back up. Learned that the hard way when everything that I owned for my publishing company was stripped from me in a single breathe. And no I'm not allowed to go back and get it all. The stories and novella's that were left behind in my office. I can promise that will never happen ever again. No man other then God will take care of me. If this is the way that men treat their families now a days they are not worth wasting my breath on. Or my time. I need that time for my Lord, my daughter and my businesses. I'm not rolling in the dough and I'm still scratching the bottom but I can promise you God will lift me up just like he lifted me out of my depression.

Life is fantastic. I'm happy no matter where I don't look for trouble and trouble refuses to have anything to do with me. I'm learning to love myself and that's all that matters to me. Being me, laugh, love and live.

Change to the Autism schedule

Yes, I have mentioned this in a previous post and yes I am going to cover it today. Change to the environment is one thing that all parents on the spectrum dread. Dread it with a passion. It the difference between continuing to progress or the start of regression.

For Doodle she has already had a regression. I blame the school on that one. She wasn't taught a thing. Couldn't read couldn't write and I had been trying for years to get her to read. But all that school would do was basically babysit her. I'm guessing that they really weren't capable of teaching special needs children because any special needs child that went there all had the same thing going for them. Nothing, no hope and no chance. And because Doodle wasn't in an environment where she was being taught I ended up with a child that used to love seeing me at school. A happy smile and hug for her mommy. That's what every parent wants from their child in grade school. She became a child who never wanted to see me. I began to feel awkward when I would travel with the school to field trips. And every time I came to the school Doodle had a note book in her hand and all she would do was doodle. Her art was suffering all the therapy she had done in the past years were out the window and her speech was gone. One day Doodle got off the school bus and she smelled awful. Literally like butt and she was wearing someone else's clothes and underwear. That was the straw that broke the camels back. IF she had had an accident at school why wasn't her wet clothes sent home? Well, that was the first time Doodle got a bath the moment she got home from school. The smell was unbearable. But that's what you get with the school that you're zoned for. I'll admit it. I cried and I prayed. My child wasn't being given her true potential.

That night a storm rolled through and with it tornado's. Our area was the hardest hit. The school was wiped off the map. Now I used to refer to Doodle as the wild child. This was a time in her life she was the worst in behavior and it's was the worst of the wild child phase, if you want to call it a phase. But there was another issue that was a factor. Storm debris. For a child on the spectrum it could seem like no big deal. We were basically living in conditions that were equivalent to a war zone. And for a child with asthma it just compounded the issue. Under those circumstances they let us transfer Doodle to a school 45 minutes from our home.

At the new school she excelled. She learned to read, to do math, to write. It was a dream come true for me. She had potential and the teachers at her new school saw and new it. I was truly blessed.

When Doodle and I moved over the summer this year. And it wasn't a move I condoned on my part it caused another regression. A regression I was not going to take. I refused. She developed PICA. And that's the gross one. I stood firm. It was the only time that I had refused to roll over and let the world take a dump on me. I held 5 IEP meetings in the first month of school. I started turning our bedroom into a sensory room.

Implementing rewards during the week helped. A slushy on Wednesdays, yogurt on Friday's and if she was really really well behaved at home and school I would take my car through the car wash. This is the equivalent of seeing going to Disney Land to her. Nothing will make the child happier than a car wash. And in all honesty this is what helped to start the progression again stopping the regression in its tracks. Is it worth it? HECK yeah!

Keeping family traditions with Autism

Since I am back in my hometown Doodle has been used to a certain Christmas tradition every year since she was an itty bitty. This year I'm not so sure if I'm going to keep the tradition of hot chocolate with whipped cream on top. If was that my now ex would cook the meal we would have later in the day and my job was the big breakfast. Which I promptly got up at 5 in the morning to start. Of course I would spend most of my night wrapping all the gifts for everyone that would appear under the tree with Santa's gifts. Every year I would stay up until 2 or 3 in the morning wrapping because everyone was good and asleep.

This year all I did was purchase the gift. My wonderful mother took care of wrapping them for me. So that is one stress that is off my back. As for making breakfast I'm not sure if I'm going to bother with that one. Might still do the hot chocolate but it isn't going to be fancy as I know the only thing Doodle will want to do the moment she wakes up is tear into gifts. That's the way it's always been. No child ever wanted to eat a good hot meal when they woke up. They only cared about the gifts. Maybe in a couple of years when I am back on my feet and Doodle and I have a house of our own that's more customized for her sensory needs will I start that tradition again. It did really mean a lot to me. I took great pains and joy trying to make the entire family happy. And since I know that Doodle will only want to tear into gifts then let her have her joy and let mommy have her break.

And since it is Christmas and I will be discussing Jesus and all the wonderful things he has done for us starting with his birth this blog will be shorter then normal.

Have a Merry Christmas and happy Holiday everyone!

The cruel fate of shopping with Autism

If it's a day that I have the opportunity to shop with my Doodle (and it's very rare) I have to be prepared mentally. Shopping with her if it's not about shopping for her can be very trying. Yes, she wants every toy under the sun and depending on the store we are in could trigger a melt down. Today, was one of those days. I'm trying to mentally and physically prepare for a photo shoot that needs to be started for the new business campaign. As the graphic designer I know exactly how I want to ad to go. Now getting those results my be a whole other animal. And since everything will need to start at the first of the month and before Doodle's birthday I either have to purchase or price now.

The merchandise for the photo shoot came in yesterday. Which means I need to start the outfits pronto. Sometimes being a creative person weighs heavily on my mind. So many things that need to be done. And yes that even includes story boards. No self respecting graphics designer or advertiser can work without one. It's the template of our bread and butter. It's the work you show to your clients or business partner(s) that gives you the green light or the red light.

And working for myself with no other employees at my disposal right now means that everything has to be handled by me. I really don't mind this aspect of my job. I prefer to know and handle my business from every aspect. Which is why I rarely allow myself to get sick. I just don't have time for it. And on the occasion that sickness does creep in it normally puts me out for a week. Well, for that I have but one thing to say. Thieves oil. I love love love the stuff. I've woken on two occasions with chills and body aches. Two drops of thieves oil and all symptoms were gone in 5 minutes. I'm serious! 5 minutes!

So today was a shopping day and since it's a Saturday and Doodle being out of school, merchandise waiting at my partners' house I had to find great prices on what I would need to put the photo shoot together. Shopping at fabric stores normally aren't a problem for Doodle but today they were the bain of existence. And of the next store a thrift shop for the outfit that would become what would be the key piece in the ad. I wouldn't buy a Thomas the Train video. She was not a happy camper. She didn't throw a fit. But it was the words and how I said them that put her back into check. "Today is not the day for mommy to buy that. We are only getting this piece and nothing else. Maybe some other time. Until then we are going for yogurt when mommy pays for this."

I have certain days set aside for for certain things. We weren't able to go for yogurt yesterday and it had to be scheduled for today. Yogurt days are important to Doodle. If she's well behaved at school all week she gets a yogurt day at the end of the week. A great way to reinforce good behavior. Naughty behavior as I call it gets the ipad taken away. And two bad days in the week gets no yogurt.

This is a technique that has worked very well, especially when Doodle and I moved back to my hometown. But I will deal with changes in environments in another blog.

Be firm and stand your ground. Children whether on the spectrum or not are manipulators and will always want to get their way.

School's out how to keep up with work

For my experience the ipad or tablet helps to keep Doodle occupied while I work, when I have a deadline. Since it's a holiday from school, both Christmas and the New Year, I'm really laxed on her sleeping schedule. She's up watching Alvin and the Chipmunk video's on youtube as it is past midnight while I write this blog and I discuss over chat with my co-host about our video show for Something Building.

I have a few ideas kicking around in my head over how I'm going to be doing the ads for our other business we do together. Right now I feel my face is on everything we do and a few things need to be changed up. Some days I can't keep up with photo shots, being a mom and entrepreneur. I don't want to feel as though I'm drowning. I still want to make time for my Doodle and my businesses.

I have 25 books I've checked out from the library in 2 days and I have to get through all of those on her school break. I'm not a professional photographer but in all honesty I really need to try my hand at it and there are a few things I still need to learn on internet marketing and sales. And the good news is I can get through a book in a day. If I'm having a little trouble following it, it will take me 2 days to finish it.

All of my blogs are usually done in one day's time. From there I schedule them and I am done for at least a week or more. Depending on what I feel needs to be shared. With autism and business there's so much to talk about. Especially since I've been on the fence for years about even doing a blog post. So here I am up late at night typing away. With a promise in my heart that I will be posting one post a day.

With that at least for three more days I have a blog to post every single day. I haven't gotten to the point where I can jot down in my planner what topic for what day I will be doing but I'm close to being there. I can honestly say that I might be able to do that after the new year.

Just know that for Christmas and the New Year they will not be messages about those days. Those are family days and if I'm lucky I might be able to send out the message that they are done. But just like autism I have no idea what the day will hold. All I can promise is that everyday at 8 am CST a blog does post.

Trimming your ASD child's nails

For me it used to be such a hassle to get Doodle's nails trimmed. And since I have to do it myself I've turned it into a sort of play with her. She's 8 and it's a perfect age to teach her to sit still. Now I will admit that I have taken her to the nail salon because I didn't want to deal with the hassle of trying to do it myself in the beginning. She loved playing in the water and squeal with delight at the lady working on her hands and feet. She still squirmed but she seemed to enjoy it. but as you know a trip to the spa to get a mani pedi does get expensive at times and I need to make sure that I can keep from having too much hurt my bottom line.

I like to make up an invitation for her. Since she is able to read it gives makes it special for her. Well, if it doesn't for her it does for me. I have lots of different colors for her to pick and choose from and for holidays I like to draw little designs on her nails. For her favorite images on her nails she normally won't chew those off. Normally the paint on her nails only lasts for a day, in some cases not even that. That's why I feel that the nail salon is just a waste of money. Doodle is still not used to having her nails trimmed no matter how often I trim them. But she is getting better at staying still for a bit.

It takes me roughly 30 minutes to do her finger nails. A little longer for her toe nails because she's really ticklish on her feet. I have noticed when I put little jewels on her fingers she's more cautious of her fingers and doesn't try to do too much rough play. Doodle loves to get dirty.

I have heard that some parents of children on the spectrum trim their kids nails while they sleep. I can't do that. Doodle is such a rough sleeper that she tosses and turns, flips and rolls all over the bed.

So there you have it! My way of teaching Doodle how to learn not to fidget and enjoy mommy daughter time. This can be done with a boy also and just forfeit the polish. Explain what you are doing during the process. I know it's not easy but starting out at the nail salon set the stage for working with her nails at home.

Remember that children on the spectrum do love to be included in what we consider normal routines for us. They love to be included and accepted.

Camel milk, autism and other "cure all's"

So yesterday's blog briefly touched on a subject of camel milk. Some people believe in the whole camel milk cures autism. No, it doesn't! Just like bleach enema's don't cure autism either. Now with the bleach thing if your considering it, realize what you are doing. This was some crack pot that concocted up an idea to take "easy" money from parents who are looking for a cure. And hey look he's taking your money and torturing your child all in the same hand swipe. Bleach is a toxin. It is not to be ingested. Not to be ingested means it shouldn't go up the butt either! Wait, why are you talking about bleach when you start off with camel milk?
I'm getting to it. Don't spend your time looking for cures. Looking for cures means your being lazy and not helping your child. If you're thinking I've crossed the line with that last sentence then you're at the wrong blog. Doodle can do a lot of things. In some areas she's far ahead of "normal" children in some area's she's a little behind.

Children on the spectrum have sensory issues. You have to deal with the sensory issues first. The sensory issues are what cause your child to shut down. Lighting, sound, smells, tastes, touch and stomach ailments. Most children on the spectrum have stomach issues. That's why a lot of them are picky eaters. Texture plays into that one too but that's a whole other blog! Because our foods in the United States are processed you will find that a lot of our children have stomach issues. Processed foods are not good for us and it's especially not good for them. This is why many parents are heading the gluten free route. It's an easy way to bypass the processed route. And yes even I have gone the gluten free route. When Doodle has regular cow milk she has a lot of stomach pains or "issues". When she has Almond milk she doesn't complain about any stomach issues at all.

See with sensory issues, children on the spectrum can't concentrate. The only thing they can focus on is the pain that they are feeling. Camel milk if not processed like cow milk can help with sensory issues but it won't cure autism. Don't waste your money for someone to take advantage of your "ignorance".  It's not ignorance if you didn't know right? Wrong. Common sense will tell you bleach doesn't go up your butt. All it takes is for someone's hands to be greased with green (money) for a whole bunch of testimonies to start popping up around the internet that bleach enema's cure autism or camel milk cures autism.

I'm not angel but I've never started out looking for a cure for Doodle's autism. I set out to help better understand her and help her. There are tons of people on the spectrum that have normal lives and many of them have gone to college. Many of them have high paying jobs. Dr. Temple Grandin is one of them. And if she can embrace her autism why can't we embrace what is making our children so wonderful? I mean, do I rally want my child to be "normal". Let's see, I have dealt with a lot of entitled children and teens who feel that walking over their parents and teachers and treating people like crap is normal. Because you know YOLO. Doodle is 8 going on 9 next month and not once have I encountered hearing out of her mouth what I have heard out of children that are younger then her demanding that someones house is hers and not theirs. I don't deal with the talk back like other parents do. Would I trade that for normal? Uh, NO!

Look if Doodle has a sensory issue in public I can deal with that. Other parents can look down at me for it. I'm used to it. But they can't look down at me if my child talks horribly to me in public because that will never happen! She's not wired that way.

If you stuck around through this "insulting" post tell me, what has been the craziest thing you've heard of as a cure for autism.

The best way to encourage autism homework

All parents on the spectrum have homework. From speech therapy, ot therapy, physical therapy (for some not all) to school homework. I've seen so many parents make just about the same mistake. The sucker or lollipop as the reward. I watched in horror as the parent on The Real Housewives hunted down not only camel milk to cure her child on the spectrum but to reward speech with a sucker. Seriously? You're going to give your child a sucker for saying a word and then expect them to continue on with speech homework? But it's a small sucker. No! Just No! Use a skittle. One little skittle and it smaller then the small sucker. They will continue coming back for more skittles but a sucker. They are done! Do yourself a huge favor and save the sucker for when you are truly done with the work.

I can't tell you how many times I've seen the news and there was a child that was found. Usually, it's cold and the child only has on a pair of shorts. But what's in that child's mouth. A sucker. That's the first clue to me it's a child on the spectrum. It's not the shorts and no shoes or shirt. It's the flipping sucker. Why would the child have a sucker you ask? Because it's a tell tell sign that the parents are using suckers to try to teach their children. And they are failing miserably! For Doodle a hard piece of candy as a reward showed me quickly when she was done. Just two more words and you can have a piece of candy. And I really can't tell you for the life of me why I used hard candy or suckers myself. It wasn't until Doodle was in the first grade her teacher told me, "There is nothing Doodle won't do for a skittle." And that's how I learned the hard way I was doing it all wrong.

Don't get me started on bubbles. You know kids love love love bubbles. My best advice to you is to go to the craft store or some place that sells tiny bottles of bubbles. Kids just don't understand when your cheeks are tired from blowing bubbles as rewards and we are done. A tiny bottle of bubbles gives you the outlet to be done and get on with other pressing matters like dinner and other kids and their homework. If you have a stash of suckers or lollipops your using to get homework done or your way of encouraging, please just throw them out! Go buy little bags of skittles and save yourself the headache and frustration of doing homework.

Do you have any other ideas of things you use to encourage more work out of your child for therapy homework?

Why I do a blog on Autism

So here is the million dollar question. Why am I blogging about autism? That's a very good question. I'm not one that watches the news and it's rare that I read it. Occasionally I will read what's trending but hey even I can't keep up with that. But for some reason and I don't know why it's the news about the kids that are murdered by their parents that get my attention.

And as it happens those are the stories where the moms kill their children who are on the spectrum because they feel over burdened. The first story I heard about was a mother in Texas. She had two children on the spectrum. Doodle had been diagnosed for maybe a year when that story broke. And I sat at my desk and cried. Why would she do that to her two children who had autism? In the article it said that she killed them because they weren't normal. Normal? In all honesty what is freaking normal in anyone's life autism or no autism.

This was about the time I was still researching autism. Had already seen the Temple Grandin movie and was learning more and more about my child and how she saw the world. Out of all the research the main thing that popped up was children on the spectrum are super geniuses. They are locked in their own minds and it's our job as the parents to help unlock them. And a huge thanks to Doodle's teacher and Para educator for the last part of kindergarten, all of first and second grade for teaching me so much on how to help Doodle and truly be there to help her grow. If it weren't for those two who worked so tirelessly Doodle would still be known as a wild child. No longer did I allow myself to be frustrated over behavior and Doodle could be very trying. When I learned her teacher was very strict and ran a tight ship I was on board! Anything to wrangle the wild child. And you know why a lot of children on the spectrum are so wild? Sometimes we as parents try to be strict. And that's the key word, try.

A couple of months ago I'm sure you have heard about the mother that took her son on the spectrum for a walk and threw him off a bridge. She did it because she couldn't handle all of the stress of taking care of her husband who could no longer work because of his illness and her son with autism. And these two women are not the only ones who have killed their children. I've read about a wealthy woman who did the same. If you google it it's not only heart breaking but makes you sick to your stomach.

And people still treat autism as if it's a horrible thing. Like a form of leprosy. But people are afraid of the unknown. Oh a disability we must run away as far as we can. All people who have no compassion for someone with a disability is showing that they are ignorant. Not taking proper care of your child because they have a disability is ignorant. A lot of parents who have children on the spectrum all agree. It's not a disability but an ability. I love my daughter and no matter how frustrated I get, not only does she sometimes need to be re-directed but sometimes so do I. You won't catch me on twitter making comments mocking hating autism. I won't because I know Doodle has lots of talents. And the fact that she can read, write and do math shows that she's working hard. She's learning and she's also an artist. I can be proud in everything that she does that is good. Because there used to be a time it took showing and teaching her over 1000 times before she got it. And I don't know why it's that way in the beginning it just is. And yes I wrote that number correctly. One thousand times.

Frustration lasts a moment, happiness for a life time. Re-direct, distract and carry on.

When Business Changes and Autism

So the jewelry that my best friend and I sell creating our own small business has merged with another company. Now grant it we haven't really been at that long. Maybe about 3-4 months we have been selling JK jewelry. Well, there has been a merger. I've already discussed mlm business mergers on the Something Building blog which you can find here http://somethingbuilding.blogspot.com/2014/12/multi-level-marketing-mergers-and-how.html

Now what this post is about is not only are we starting over in our business but starting at the bottom wrung again. No big deal we aren't the only ones starting on the bottom wrung. Everyone who wants to continue on with their business has to start at the bottom. Good news is the company that we merged with is thirty-one and I met a few months ago a wonderful girl whose business is thirty-one. She's excited and I'm excited. And the one thing that we both have in common is our love of special needs kids.

So it was no surprise that we were chatting on facebook and she shared the purse that we will all be selling. A cute candy pink purse made by Jewell purse company that was founded by thirty-one's owners' own sister. And that's the moment Doodle came over to the computer. Now remember Doodle has autism and yes she can read. Remember these children have words and pictures thrust upon them the moment they go into therapy. Even if they can't say the words they can read them. And the words out of Doodles mouth is, "I want pink candy purse, please." Well, now I know the first order I'm placing when we all start selling the purses and the JK jewelry. The pink candy purse in March. She's turning into such a girl!

So thanks Mandi! That's all I needed to purchase. Two candy pink purses, one for me and the other for her!

But here's the biggest shock for you guys. Yeah, I sell jewelry and not essential oils. WHAT??? Yeah I know. I truly believe in essential oils but I don't sell them. That's kind of funny to me. When my favorite essential oil company starts selling as multi-level marketing then I will be signing up faster then you can blink. The reason I don't use Young Living or DoTerra is because I can't stand behind a company that I can't run out and get at that very moment. When I get it into my head to create a new product for Doodle and myself to use I can't wait a week or more to get the oils. I have to be able to have them in my hands at that very moment. The essential oils that I use that are easy for me to purchase from any health food store is Now. I love their oils. Moderately priced so I'm not going over any type of budget and can still deal with Doodle's growth spurts, since all we had were the clothes on our backs when we started over.

There is a company called Aura Cacia that sells essential oils too. And the reason I'm not over the moon about them like I am over the Now company is they are certified and it's pure but my problem is it's too strong. The Now company puts grape seed oil or other carrier oil in their products and when I put them on my face they don't burn. Case in point Tuesday night I put carrot seed oil on my face from the Aura Cacia company. It burned my skin and that feeling would not go away. I tried putting rose hip oil on it to take away the sting. That didn't work. I finally put my homemade Vaseline on it. Ah the relief! Luckily for me I didn't end up with redness on my face.

If you haven't tried to make your own Vaseline I highly suggest that you attempt creating this just once. Especially, since it's winter. It keeps your skin hydrated and bonus, no chemicals. You know exactly what you put into it.

Will I date again? Probably not. That was a hassle. Fun but still a lot of hassle. Will I get married again? More then likely not, unless Johnathan Silver Scott is the one asking. He is so easy on the eyes! Can you tell I watch a lot of HGTV? Okay, so I really don't have time to really watch HGTV but it is always playing in the background and I do get to catch a glimpse of him here and there. Luckily for me Johnathan gets more air time then his twin brother Drew. You can tell them apart by their smiles.

So here's the big question for today. Who is your favorite Property Brother and why?

I'm going BLIND!

So it's still Monday right now. If you read yesterdays blog you know how tired I am at the current moment. I'm not dressed to the nines as I always am but I did finally decide to put on make up and continue trying my new concoction of chemical free make up. The mascara. And it seemed to be working pretty well until today! Maybe I used too much lavender oil but my eyes get the feeling of, are you serious? when I put the mascara on. Have you seen the price of chemical free makeup? Yeah that price and my wallet don't get along! $22.00 for the price of a tiny container of eye shadow. I'm a woman, youtube tells us that we need to wear 5 different shades at once! Well that and fashion magazines. I'm a little slow. Give me a video tutorial. Heck for that price I can head to the baking section of the craft store and get powdered forms of food coloring and whip up different colors for that price!

As long as it's edible we are suppose to be able to use it. I'm thinking maybe creating some colors using berries. Green from spinach. Might be fun. Thanks to Herbs and Oils world for that piece of information for food coloring ideas.

There I was, sitting in the chair applying the top coat of mascara to the top of my lashes on my left side. When out of the blue this magnetic field happened between the mascara wand and my eyeball! That's pretty much when I found out one, that freaking burns!!!! And two, my mascara isn't so waterproof no matter how much beeswax is in it! It felt as though I had the rock that David threw at Goliath in my eye! And that sucker wasn't coming out! And that's when I realized everything is going blurry! OMG, I'm going blind! After a bit of crying from the stabbing pain of the brush in my eyeball subsided I realized if I had just have looked around the room instead of trying to keep focused to find the log in my eye, it was the mirror that had fogged up not my eye site.  Hey look lesson learned. Don't happily apply chemical free homemade mascara when your so tired you can give sleeping beauty a run for her money.

Didn't have this problem when I applied my 3D Lashes and poked the same freaking left eyeball this morning. For some reason it was like oh poked myself, didn't hurt.

So tell me, have you tried going chemical free yet. Do you have a success story or have you been debating it?

Monday's Autism Blues and sleep deprivation!

Yeah I know your reading this on a Tuesday. But in all honesty I've already posted the blog I wanted to share on Monday. Missing out on sleep. Yeah you know I'm talking to you. We've all had those days! How on earth can these children function with no sleep? Seriously, go to sleep!!!

Well, I can say that it's been a long time since I've had to worry about loosing sleep thanks to autism. Until last night! It used to be my doodle would get a 5 minute nap and stay up for 24 hours straight! Fall asleep on the bus coming home, meant she would fall to sleep at 5 am, nap and up at 5:30 to start the whole exhausting day over. I can't count how many days I had been dragging. Literally, dragging myself everywhere. Keeping the fake smile plastered on my face like I was happy every moment of the day to show everyone life won't get me down.

Some see the glass half empty, I'm the one that sees it half full with plenty to share. Cause yeah, I will be sharing as Doodle will take it. Well, when doodle and I got kicked to the curb by her father. Thanks for the complex and making sure that you kept everything from my business I started leaving us to start over from the bottom, (insert your own dirty word). But we have a new life and new stresses left me in a bind with Doodles regression because children on the spectrum can't handle change. Do I continue living in a life where autism rules my life? Heck no!

I like to follow autism blogs on facebook. One mom has tons of followers. She calls herself Mamma Fry. I love Mamma Fry. If it weren't for reading one of her posts about melatonin. That is what she uses to get her kid with autism to sleep. Never heard of that one before, and then all the comments of it's on sale at CVS! I ran out and bought out the store, replied a few people. Well now! Looks like I might be on a path to getting some sleep. Hmm. So after some research on melatonin I found out it's not habit forming and it doesn't cause any type of damage to your child. BONUS!

Don't give your child nyquil or other forms of the like as this can cause kidney damage. Melatonin doesn't give you that problem. So our nightly routine is some Calm Child I get at the health food store and melatonin in candy form from Walgreens. And wouldn't you know it, last night I forgot to give her her perfume. 

I use two essentials oils for her perfume to calm her. Frankincense and orange oil. I can't use lavender due to the fact it doesn't help to calm her down but for some reason the orange oil does. 

After I finished working on the blog last night at 11 pm I heard it. The most terrifying sound for a parent to hear before they go to bed. The giggle. Please say she's having a dream. And then the ever dreaded, "Mamma, I want water please." What happened to sleeping all night? I promise you she had to have snuck into the bathroom and brushed her teeth.  That happened last month. She ate her bedtime candy and ran right to the bathroom to brush her teeth.

Chemical free toothpaste is what I use. Make it myself, thanks to wellness momma. This stuff removes toxins from your body and it's the only toothpaste that I use as going back to regular toothpaste has her having tantrums and harder to get her to focus and behave at school. She gets in a lot of trouble at school when she's on regular toothpaste. If you ever caught the old episode of Regis and Kelly for the teacher of the week. I was so proud my daughter was featured on TV. Until it was then I found out she's a freaking terror at school! Thanks for all the lies that she's been good all day! Back on subject. She used the toothpaste it removes the melatonin from the body so sleep will not come. Darn being chemical free!!!!!

Last night I don't know what happened. She woke up at 11 pm and didn't go to sleep until 3 in the morning. And yeah she wanted to make sure I didn't sleep either. As she and I share a room if Doodle ain't asleep mommy ain't getting any sleep.

And of course the alarm went off at 5:30 and I dragged my body up to hit the snooze button, only to wake again at 7:22 am. Darn it! I slept right through my alarms! And it was a serious debate. Let her get a tardy or keep her home. What am I thinking, she's got 5 minutes to get to school where she won't get a tardy! I can do this!!! And I did. Fastest I have ever gotten her ready, hair brushed, teeth brushed, clothes on, socks and shoes. Yeah, I didn't have time to hear her grip about not wanting to go to school. Tonight if I have too I'm going to pour her "perfume" essential oils on the bed to make sure she stays asleep. Oh and hide the tooth paste!

What was one of your wildest moments due to sleep deprivation?

Finally got the blog autism picture finished

I love graphic design. Creating new and unique pictures that you can manipulate. Out of my sometimes crazy unpredictable life, manipulating pictures is self soothing for me. Brings calm to the chaos. I showed Doodle the new work that I created for this blog and looking at the frog I didn't have to tell her what type of frog it was. She already knew and said, "Hey look, tree frog!"

The reason I picked the tree frog to go with the puzzle piece is sometimes it's confusing to know what the symbol for autism is. Some pages have a frog and it is the ugliest frog I've seen. Other sites have the puzzle piece and then there is the last group. The group that has the blue. Well my company already had the blue on our logo because that was the way I wanted it to be designed. I started off in the beginning by keeping it simple. Something that I could draw free hand as well as do in the computer.

Maybe I will change my company logo down the road. Maybe not. It's my business, my baby, I will dress it the way that I want too.

And speaking of dressing it the way I want to, has anyone else read the Refashionista? I love her blog. If you haven't had a chance to catch it you can find it here. http://refashionista.net/ I can spend hours looking through her site.

As well as her site I also love finding people to follow on Pinterest that like to refashion. I don't try all the refashions because I'm not a fan of some of the looks.

Well today is a Sunday and since Doodle is home we are enjoying another day of leisure. The tablet died and needed to be charged. I won't let her use it while it charges because she is killing all the charger cords! I've been through 9 chargers in 3 months. That's is just killing my bottom line. As the chargers for ipad mini's at $15.00 a piece. She was upset when I plugged it in to be charged and closed it up in a drawer. But after awhile she went to playing with her Melissa and Doug doorbell/locks house. I got it at the thrift store for $2.49. For those that know the company you know that piece runs pretty high. This is one of those things I allow for her to play with because it helps her with her fine motor skills. All while she watches Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs. She loves that movie. Normally she runs around the house while it's on and gets mad when you try to change the channel. Life on the spectrum can be challenging but in all honesty it doesn't have to be.

Going Chemical Free

The biggest change in my daughter's behavior started changing 3 years ago, when she was almost 6. Her behavior when from unbearable to a child that I could correct when she was misbehaving. And that's when the speech really started to come in. She had a case of head lice. Darn little menace bugs. You can get lice shampoo and that's what I did. Bad news is that it didn't help. I had to call our pediatrician and get the over the counter nuke them shampoo.

Luckily I have a best friend that is a nurse and I got to talk to her about this whole lice thing that was awful, causing me to spray the entire house, mattresses, furniture and anything else that wouldn't fit into the washing machine with bug spray. She informed me that I really needed to be careful using bug spray on anything that my doodle opp touches and the nuke shampoo (as I call it), that it causes cancers. Well of course I just wanted to find a corner and cry. I could seriously have hurt my child because of the school nurses advice of using bug spray on everything too large for the washing machine and a lice shampoo that was noted as being able to kill the super lice bug. So that day I took off from working on the projects that I had for my business and began researching ways to get rid of the lice bug. Granted it was gone at this point and time but I wanted to make sure that it didn't come back EVER again.

At this point this is where I learned about tea tree oil and eucalyptus oil. This stuff was great for cleaning counters, floors, door knobs, put a few drops each into your child's shampoo and so forth. I've been using it for almost 3 years now. According to the research that I have found the lice bug hates these essential oils. I throw in a little lavender to take away the hospital smell from the essential oils. Those were the first three essential oils that I bought from the health food store. The more I researched the essential oils and found out them I was loving essential oils. The next oil for me to get was not an essential oil it was the super expensive coconut oil. I was reading forums about essential oils that helped children on the spectrum. About this time I had read in the news that Johnson and Johnson's baby shampoo contained formaldehyde. That was a nightmare in itself because I was still using the baby shampoo on my doodle opp. She has super fine hair just like me and I really trusted Johnson and Johnson. Now could this have been one of the reason's why she had autism? Not sure but possibly. 

Don't believe me on the news article about that one? Well here is the link for you to read from Huffington Post back when I found out about the cancer causing shampoo.  http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/11/01/johnson-johnson-baby-sham_n_1069123.html

As of this post that I am currently writing back in January of 2014 they have changed their formula for their baby shampoo. Here is the link from the NYTimes article about it.  http://www.nytimes.com/2014/01/18/business/johnson-johnson-takes-first-step-in-removal-of-questionable-chemicals-from-products.html?_r=0

I'm really glad they changed their formula. But the damage had already been done for me. I no longer trust Johnson and Johnson. I did find at the health food store my second trip around a bar of shampoo made by J.R. Liggett. Love this shampoo bar. Of course switching to this shampoo bar took some getting used too. I wanted to go back to a time when Autism wasn't much of a factor. My daughter was the first child in my entire family history that had autism. On her father's side there was one child already that had been diagnosed and was a few years older then my daughter.

Now going with a bar shampoo it takes about a month for your hair to get used to this type of shampoo as your hair learns to make its own oils. It's one of very few shampoos that I have found that do not contain the chemical sls. Sodium lauryl sulfate is a highly dangerous chemical that is added to everything from shampoo's toothpastes, body washes, conditioner, washing detergent, laundry detergent and the list goes on and on. This is a chemical that gets into the bloodstream through our pores and through our mouth. Did you know that it is recommended that when you clean your counters with lysol you're suppose to wipe down the counters with soap and water afterwards. Yes, using this product to clean our home as a convenience we all love to clean again afterwards for the safety of our children.

This sls chemical could be another reason why my child has autism as I have used nothing but products that contained these chemicals when I was pregnant with my daughter and that includes Crest toothpaste (I've used since I was little). Only God himself knows how and why a child gets autism. It's my job as the parent to make life easier for her and her sensory issues. And I will admit that since I have gone sls chemical free the sensory issues that used to trigger the most horrendous tantrums no longer happen. Another thing that really helped me to better understand that what I was doing as  right was I discussed this issue with people on the spectrum that spoke very clearly and I had the wonderful opportunity to meet. They have also agreed that removing all the sls chemicals was a great way to help my child as they were having issues with the same chemicals and their own sensory issues.

Creating your own cleaners is not your thing like it is mine, try this website to help you http://slsfree.net/. Find the products that you want to be able use to clean your house and your child.

And not only are essential oils helping children on the spectrum but they also can help children that have ADD and ADHD. I was informed by the doctor that diagnosed my doodle opp, these three live in the same family. That's really not surprising considering that they same problem, concentration and focus.

Well, that's all for now. More posts to come and they will be about all the essential oil and things that I do and use to help not only my daughter but myself.

I make her smile

So tonight I'm working on a graphic design piece that I will be using for this blog and on my website. Not only do I own my own business but I also co-work with my best friend on a few projects. We do a show together that I write the blog for and we sell jewelry together. The multi level marketing jewelry company that we have as a business just merged and we've been trying to find out all the details and if we should could continue on or not. My best friend and I are excited over the news. We get more than just jewelry to sell now and we both agree this is fantastic news.

Being a business owner is a lot of fun. And just like having a child it can be very demanding. But I wouldn't change it because it's a free schedule. I don't report to anyone but myself and sometimes my best friend. Hey he's my doodle's Godfather, he understands. I will say that if I worked in his office that he has cause he owns his own business that he created as well I would not have a flexible schedule and would put a strain on our relationship. Always remember to know where you stand.

Today is a Saturday and my doodle oop is out of school on the weekends. And Christmas is coming which means less time for work more time for my little doodle. Today has been a bit long for me. Trying to watch my daughter, trying to get through this book that needs to be finished. It's work related.

I was in the process of starting her wind down. But it doesn't really happen until our ipad is taken away from her. Remember that's a stimulate to the brain. If you want her child to get sleep and you allow them to have that at bedtime it's a big mistake. This week I had been doing a lot of refashioning. I'm love love loving refashioning. Taking old clothes and making them new again. Well, Doodle is into the infinity scarf. She can't get enough of them.  Has to wear shirts that have them. I had been hearing a lot about the Goodwill stores that offer clothing for $1.00 a pound and well I found one of those Goodwill stores. I went there and bought a few shirts and sweaters. The sweaters I turned into infinity scarves and leg warmers. Only one sweater I couldn't do anything else with after I turned it into parts of it into leg warmers. Since it was close to bedtime I figured I could just give the sweater to my large dog to wear. Her fur isn't as thick as my shelties' fur. My doodle called out, "Good job, mom!" I had no idea she was even paying attention to me. I sometimes forget she's more observant than I give her credit for.

So tonight we were just chilling enjoying the weekend. Jumping on the trampoline earlier today. She wanted to just lay on the trampoline and me pop her up with my jumps. I wanted to jump with her. I won out. We held hands and jumped together. Laughing and giggling until all the jumping gave me a headache. I've gone from a size 22 to a size 14 which are a bit baggy and I can fit in a size 12. I can't be back at 22 as it was really hard to keep up with my doodle oop. Children on the spectrum have so much energy! And they can run off quickly and we as parents have to be able to keep up.

As it's getting to be 11 pm and I still have a lot of graphic design work to finish up, I will end this here. Property Brothers is on and I love Jonathan Silver Scott. Nothing hotter then a man who can work with his hands! And I've gotten messages from a few friends asking me to tell them more about EO's (essential oil's) that I use because my doodle is on NO medications for behavior. Back before I discovered EO's she needed to be medicated because her behavior was horrible! I used to call her the wild child because that's the way she was, WILD! I will discuss EO's in later posts.

Communication and Autism

Even when the words just don't come there are ways that you and your child can communicate. At one point and time our speech therapist wanted us to get a dynovox. These are the talking computers that uses pictures to help the child speak. There pretty neat. When I was in high school there was a young man that used one of these boxes to communicate. He was pretty cool and funny. A great guy. Children can understand the pictures. Since our children start speech therapy at young ages they are shown a lot of flash cards and taught the words that go with the pictures from day one.

Communication books. Now these things are fabulous. We have a communication book and they are actually pretty easy to create yourself if you need one. There are lots pictures that go along with this and as long as you separate them into different categories. For instance the categories are colors, shapes and numbers, cooking, bugs, garden, weekend, pets, community helper, verbs, outer space, art, circle time, feeling, play, fruits/veggies, snack, dress up, body parts, shower, reinforcers, and describing on the flap of the communication book are the pictures and words for I, you, it, yes, help, want, play, no, look, like, don't like, go, put, do, get, take, clean up, big, little, bathroom, under, between, beside, finished, out, in, on and more. We had a small communication book our speech therapist made up for us when my daughter first started speech therapy. It was okay but trying to find the pages to get to the words that she was trying to say really didn't help and made her frustration even worse. When she was in the first grade the school created up a communication book that was better organized and a bit bigger. Still use this communication book today when it's hard to understand what she needs or wants.

And the last way of communicating with your child no matter what age they are is sign language. I've learned quite a few words in sign language and it is something that my daughter knows. If I just use the sign for please when she forgets to ask for something and ask please, she will correct sentence to include the word please. If she is suppose to tell someone thank you all I have to do is say her name with the sentence, "What do you say?" while using the sign for thank you. She will then say Thank you very much (inserts name).

Younger children it's easier to to get them to use these items and even for the older children with no speech. For older kids middle school and up try using computers. You'd be surprised. Even children who develop no speech can still speak typing out their wants and needs and telling you whats on their minds. Remember these are children who have been learning with flash cards and words since day one therapy started. They know the words. and remember as I have said it before these are children that see in pictures.

So go out and learn something new with your child. They will love that your taking the time to come into their world and they will take notice. Entrepreneur on!

Entrepreneur and Autism

Having my own business has afforded me the opportunity to be able to drop anything at a moments notice to make sure that my daughter went to all her therapy appointments, doctors appointments and was able to be there for her from the moment she got on the school bus to the moment she got off the school bus in the afternoons. Whether you have created your own business as I have done or you do multi level marketing, having your own business makes being a parent of a child with disabilities less stressful during these hectic moments of our lives.

Because I do work at home I used to have a lot of distractions during the day that kept me form getting all of my work done during the week. It wasn't just my daughter it was the life that I lived. Luckily for me, our life has changed dramatically. I've never been a fashion conscious kind of girl. I'm a rebel. Always have been always will be. Keeping up with fashion will never be my forte. Family has always laughed at me when I would wear different clothing sometimes a year before it became popular. I like what I like, what can I say?

I've always been fiercely loyal to my family no matter what. And for that I lost myself in my marriage, my business and therapy. I did so much research in my daughters short life that I gave google a run for it's money! During the summer my life got flipped upside down. My daughter and I found ourselves basically homeless. Lost everything in regards to my business and had to pick the pieces and start from scratch in a new town starting with a new life. Yeah I'm tackling this stage of my life. I've worked hard with my daughter and her autism. No one understands her better then I do. And why not, I'm her voice when she can't say what she's trying to say.

So always remember your convenience of your business is yours and yours alone. No one can take that from you. And when they do the pieces are easy to pick up. You will get back on your feet and the hump is just a small mole hill. You created your business, you work hard on it. Just don't be stupid, protect your business and your heart. Because the heart is where life begins and life flows.

On that note I have one more blog to write for Something Building the show that my friend and I do together and then on to Graphic Design. Have a great day and entrepreneur on!

Autism and the Holidays

So on youtube there's a commercial done by a family and target for the holiday season. I'll admit it I need back ground noise while I work and love listening and watching Lucky Penny Shop. Anyway the commercial is about a family making their Christmas wish list. You can see the kids and dad throwing things in the buggy that will make them happy for the Christmas season. I saw this and thought do I really want my child to grow greed in her heart to think the only thing that will make her happy is piling a bunch of toys into a buggy? How can I teach her about what truly makes one happy during the Christmas season? And it hit me. I can have my daughter go to the store and have a wish list too. To fulfill one child's wish this holiday year. For her to pick out what she would like for another child to have that might not have a Christmas. Let's face it, in the news I'm still hearing about people loosing their jobs and nothing would peeve me off more then seeing someone who can get tons of toys when I wouldn't even be able to barely put food on the table or make sure the light bill was paid.

Yeah I'll admit it, we are kind of in that boat. It's been a rough year for us. She doesn't see it. I make sure that she thinks she's having an adventure. And all the while strengthening our mother daughter bond. And hey life is an adventure and you get out of it what you make it. There will be hard times and hard times are only just a drop in the bucket. A time you will barely remember and keep close to your heart to help someone else that has found themselves in the same boat that you have found yourself in.

I don't get my doodle opp a lot for Christmas. Enough to put under the tree and fill her stocking with gifts from loved ones passed so that she can get a sort of memory from the ones that have passed on and keep their love for others alive. Starting last year which was the first of the rough year I still made sure that she had gifts to open. Last year she got the same thing she basically gets this year. Art supplies. I've forgone the Chipmunk coloring book because well I just couldn't find it this year, but she still gets the art pads, the special markers (yeah they are under $5.00 but it works well for her artwork). Along with a few other items that are for creating art.

Her special talent with Autism is art and she's always shown such promise as an artist since she was itty bitty. From the moment that she was able to stand with the help of furniture was about the time that I allowed her to have crayons and paper under proper supervision. No one wants a baby choking or chewing on a crayon. And paper should be considered a sometime food. I'm kidding but in all honesty kids eat paper, there's no avoiding that one no matter how hard you try.

This year like every year she has what she needs under the tree. And the best part of this holiday season is that she will be starting her first steps for learning to give. Let her heart not be filled with greed but to be filled with always wanting to help others.

We have to teach our children the love of Jesus. To learn to share love and that giving to someone else is more important then always taking. These are loving children we just need to teach them a little more of giving, caring and being there for one another. This is my way of teaching about standing up for someone if they are bullied. To do what is right and not go with the crowd of making someone feel lower then low. Just because we are all different doesn't mean that we should feel less of who we are by other peoples standard's. Because as it says in the Bible, we were fearfully and wonderfully made. Like I've mentioned in a previous post I'm a Jesus Freak. You get used to it the longer you stick around me.

So let the holiday hoop-la begin with a special gift before she turns 9 by learning that giving is far better than receiving. Because what you get in return is far better than the emptiness of a gift you wanted so badly and throw on the floor to not think about the day after Christmas and beyond.

The dreaded word Autism

Let's talk about the dreaded word known as Autism. Parents run from it screaming like it's giant booger about to drop on someone's head. So most parents fear it. Backing away from vaccines because it will change their child into something they don't want to deal with. What are they fearing? The hard work involved to unlock their child? The fact that their child is a super genius? If they do their job correctly their child can change the world. You love those smart phones, ipads, play stations, computers, x-boxes and all the techie things that makes life "easier and fun". Yeah, that was created by people on the spectrum. So whats so bad about it? What makes it worse then cancer or aids. It's the unknown.

When my daughter was diagnosed on the spectrum I was so relieved. OMG! I know you're thinking I'm a freak. The only freak I am is a Jesus Freak. I was relieved because with an official diagnoses I could get my child the help that she needed. I now had a path to go on. And from there I could do research to understand and help my little "doodle-oop" (my nickname for my daughter). And all that work and research still didn't help me to figure out my child who had NO speech. I was still in that world of why can't she do what she is suppose to be doing? We are doing all these therapies and nothing is getting any better. Why is there still no speech? Why, when, where & what?

The eye opening moment was when the movie Temple Grandin came on HBO. My whole world changed. Yeah my world didn't change before or directly after the diagnoses. It changed after the movie. I had no clue that she saw and experienced the world differently then we did. She sees the world in pictures. How cool is that? She's like a little super hero. That's how she's able to operate in the world. And once you understand how your child understands and the sees the world the better it is for you to be able to help them.

I wanted to start off with our background history so you can better understand us. My life as a parent with a child on the spectrum is a lot like yours. My child at first had no speech. She didn't start speaking until she was 6. That's when the words came in, so if your child is under six and has limited speech please don't be alarmed or worried. I will tell you in a future blog post how to communicate with your child that has worked for me. And one thing that I have found in my research is that for a child on the spectrum, most kids start speaking when they turn six.

But on to the seriousness. The reason this blog is called Mom Trep's Autism is because it's hard having a child that requires so much attention and work full time. I like many mom's work for myself. I'm an entrepreneur. It affords me the time and attention to drop anything at a moments notice for my daughter. We have a strong bond. She's respectful and well behaved. A child that is respectful. Yep, it's not hard. It's a complement that I receive almost daily. We don't have the tantrums out in public that we used to have. She's 8 and yes she knows that sometimes you get what you want and sometimes you don't. For my life with her it is grand. And I wouldn't have it any other way.