So we were sitting on the front porch waiting for the bus and Doodle takes off to be curious at the front side of the house. She likes looking for bugs and critters. And today she found a toad. A toad she wanted to bring into the house. So she came back to where I was sitting and grabbed her book bag, went back to the spot where she first noticed what she wanted and then ran to the front door. "I go potty."
That was my first red flag. "No, you are not going potty. Show me what is in your book bag." She handed me her book bag. I asked, "What do you have in there?" She covered the small pocket in the front and replied with, "raincoat". Well, that narrowed that down of where she hid what she was trying to bring into the house. I unzipped the pocket and asked her what was in there. "A toad." I demanded that she go set it free to be with it's family. That it would be happier being with it's family and friends. She did let the toad go but she was not a happy camper. And when I made her go back inside and wash her hands she got mad!
But as a parent of a child on the spectrum you pick your battles and this was a battle I had to be willing to fight. I couldn't let her go to school with toad essence on her hands. I mean toads live outside. They like to scruff the ground with their butts. And there is no guarantee they wipe when they go to the bathroom. She was mad but I did get her to finally wash her hands. And of coarse she cried. She cried when we went back outside. She cried when the bus pulled up. Heck she cried getting on the bus. The bus driver asked what was wrong. And I told her. Doodle's mad cause I won't let her have a toad as a pet and had it in the book bag.
I really wish that toad would move on and leave the front part of the house alone. But it has yet to get memo that it really doesn't belong there for its safety. And the whole time Doodle is crying she saying, "No school. School closed." Her bus driver who apparently is deathly afraid of toads and frogs and lizards, told Doodle, "Toad closed!" I've got to remember that for the next time Doodle doesn't want to go somewhere and tells me something is closed because she doesn't want to go there.
When Doodle came home from school, her eyes went directly to the spot where she first caught the toad. And I blocked that area with my body. There was no way I was gonna let Doodle get past me to hunt the toad down. She came inside, threw a little stink but it was done and over with as quickly as it started.
I was not in the mood this morning to battle with Doodle. Most of the times it's just easier to give in. But it was a battle that I had to do. We have them. We don't have to fight them all. Now I don't get tantrums in stores when she wants something and I tell her no. She lost that battle a long long time ago, several times over. But you have to stand firm and you have be the parent. She used to have outbursts in store. Heck school shopping this year we had an incident. The crowds were too much and I was participating for the first time ever in the tax free sales. The only problem was I didn't have a sitter for her. But her supplies had to be purchased. At least shorts and pants. Cause Doodle is rough on the bottoms. I have 3 pairs of shorts right now that have to be brought in cause I bought them a bit baggy. Lets face it, if the child hoola hoops or takes one step she will end up pants less. I have a sewing machine. I'm prepared to put in the work. I just haven't gotten to it yet. But I will. She kept her fingers in her ears the entire time as I shopped. She was getting antsy and I was trying to shop as quickly as I could. By the time I reached the actual supplies of pencils and pens, papers and notebooks it was getting harder to keep her attention. They are going to be her supplies so she had to pick them out herself. A large thunder storm had rolled through and it was so loud the storm echoed through the building. Thankfully, another autism mom was there and she assured me everything would be fine. And the fingers in the ears. She would grow out of that. Her daughter did. It was the light at the end of the tunnel that I needed. The more that we stand together and help one another out even if it's just a bit of advice or a glimpse in the future. I will take it and and hold onto it like it's my ice cream! I may have meet the mom for a moment but she's my new best friend and the highlight of my life. She just doesn't know it.
By the time we checked out, it was full blown meltdown mode. But let people look cause I haven't cared what people have thought of me in a very long time. I was going to pay for the items that we needed. There was no, you want chocolate? You want a drink? She just had to deal with it. I was going to finish this race! She cried, for several hours. Truth be told she cried until she went to sleep on 3 melatonin pills at 2 mg each that night. But the task was done. She just got to cry and be a jerk at home. That hopefully she would be better by the next day. And yeah, it was like that yesterday never even happened. Same happy kid she normally is.
As the day draws to a close for me. And I'm overly tired for today. Too much work and too little time. I'm going to call it a night. Though maybe by the time you guys read this it will be Good Morning! And I'm on hopefully my second cup of coffee.
See you guys on the flip side.
Doodle's art work she did during the summer.
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