Where I've been autism

 Working for a giant corporation and having a publishing company are not the easiest things to keep up with. I also work for Grumbacher, an art company based in Massachusetts and new lines coming to the publishing company and art classes that I need to get taken care of. Throw a free monthly magazine, autism and a sick family member into the mix and you have a busy mom. 

But in all honesty who isn't busy right now. There is so much that I personally have to get done in a day and quite frankly I'm dealing with burn out. There is a lot going on in my personal and professional life. So when I am able to write for the blog yay for me. But it's not gonna be easy to work on the blog.

Lots of people say that I am able to do everything and when I have deadlines I always hear you can do this for me and still get your work done. You always do. Yeah, I always do with a lot of stress on my shoulders. People don't understand how much that weighs on me and I'm not gonna show that on the outside. 

Crafting is the way that I sometimes calm down and just chill. I do that with painting and drawing as well but I really can't get to that right now either. As much as I would like to. I just can't find the time for it all. I need to practice on my 3d resin art pieces. I would like to be able to teach that with my online classes but as of right now there just isn't the time.

So it's been really hard getting to writing on the blog. When I set up my priorities the blog falls on the very bottom of the list. One of those things that I just can't get it. It used to be that I would be able to write the blog Sunday night and have it posted on Monday morning. But I was also working nights and didn't have a magazine that I was responsible for. I just worked for the corporation and Grumbacher. Just had to make sure that I had books published. Now I have new lines coming out. Sure I'm not teaching classes in person anymore but I don't want my daughter to suffer without having me there for her. I can't be an absent parent. And that's my biggest fear is being an absent parent. She can't succeed without help and guidance. 

I like having off days but I'm not giving myself that option with all that I do. Responsibilities are really important to me. It fuels my stress. And I can't keep thriving on that.

I know that it's important to have as much information on autism as parents can find and yeah I make raising a child on the spectrum look easy but what stresses one person out when it comes to autism doesn't stress out the other person. 

Doodle can be easy to raise and there are days where she fights on what she's going to do and what she's not going to do. Also having a great support system is another way to get through this life. And that is really hard to find. I'm lucky. I have devised a tight support system. People that will pull me back when I need help the most. My family is pretty great about making sure that I have my own time.

It's not just autism life that can be stressful, but it's how you look at your life that determines how your life is actually lived. Some parents take the smallest things and blow them up to be something it really isn't. You pick and chose your battles. I let a lot of stuff just slide. Cause there really isn't a point in getting even more stressed out than what I already am.

It will be nice to get to a point where I can craft for myself. My daughter loves some of the crafts that I make. Half of what goes into the magazine for sensory craft are things that she personally asks for. And that's a lot of stress and research to make sure that I get it correct. Cause no one wants something that will be torn up. It has to last for a long time. The sensory blanket, that was a great idea in theory. It didn't have beads in it cause I didn't want to be cleaning beads up forever. Yeah, Doodle tore the sensory blanket up. The only thing she sleeps with is the jean material that was the top part of the weighted blanket. That has become her favorite blanket. It still has weight to it. So something that isn't so big is the way to go when it comes to a weighted blanket. 

The lava lamp that didn't require heat to work or tablets to move, that was the best thing that I created. It lasted maybe 6 months before she tore it up too. But that's life with autism. Life in general is not easy but it's how you approach it. 

So in conclusion I wrote the first part of this blog maybe two weeks ago and thought oh yeah I'll come back to this. Yeah I was able to come back to it but I've already lost my train of thought with it. I've got a lot going one. Large projects for the magazine and other things that need my attention. I'm trying to figure out a good way to balance my time so I can squeeze in more projects for my company and being there for those that need me with the blog. There is a possibility I may just close down the blog. Write advice and help in a book and call it a day. 

Doodle changes so much as she grows and that means dealing with autism changes as well. So it's a toss up of what to do.

See you guys on the flip side.

Back to school, Autism

I can honestly say that I am so excited about Doodle going back to school. I would say that I've been waiting for this the day after school let out, but it really hasn't been that bad this winter break. Sure she's done a lot of stemming and she's been sick and I've been sick. But it hasn't been that bad.

I went back to work on Saturday and Doodle goes back to school today. She's made a lot of progress during the winter break and I am elated!

I overheard her talking to herself and she actually slowed down and pronounced the word feathers. The th sound had always been a problem for Doodle. But she's more cautious now with how she is pronouncing things. And that makes me so happy.

I've spent as much time as I could with Doodle during the break while sick and trying to finish the magazine. The autism life is not always easy and the work involved makes me feel like I'm on teacher duty 24/7. But I'm starting to see progress again and that matters the most to me.

I want my child to succeed. And I'm going above and beyond to get her to that point. I'm still hoping that she wants to be doctor when she grows up. But if she wants to be an artist I will support that too. Whatever her future holds I'm willing to be there and support her to the best of my abilities. I always have and I always will.

If you are a parent and your child has just been diagnosed the most important thing to remember is the first three years are the hardest. All the appointments with doctors and therapists. Trying to figure out what would be the best thing for your child and it feels like you get no rest. Everything is jumbled together and if you can remember to breathe you're doing alright. There are bad doctors out there and there are bad therapists out there. If you feel like you're not being heard as a parent switch your child to someone else. That's the only way that your child has the stepping stones to succeed.

Today when I got up the first thing I sent off to the school was my letter for an IEP. I have the mitts our pediatrician sent to us. Cause those things were not the easiest to find here. And since these are technically our mitts, I want them back at the end of the school year just like I have to get the breathing machine from the school.

Well my day is already filled and I need to get back to work on the magazine and new programs I'm learning.

If you want to read the newest issue of the magazine you can find it here. This month and next month we are tackling a weighted blanket. Check it out. www.jsncreative.com/ezine Remember it's free, no need to use your email to view it and NO ads!

See you on the flip side!

New Year another day, Autism

Thank you so much that today is the last day for December.

I'm late getting the magazine done cause I was sick with the same stuff Doodle was sick with and that meant I could barely function. But naps were my friend. Doodle has taken to her Christmas presents. I have to push Doodle and keep her out of her comfort zone. Yeah, I know the comfort zone is what keeps our kids calm. Well, I'm not one of those parents. She somewhat loves learning as long as it's not at school. At home learning new things helps keeps her busy and out of trouble.

For the new year I'm going to try my hardest to turn her pictures she drew as a 6 year old into a book. That would be awesome to get that done around her birthday. But I myself am learning a new program for my publishing company. I'm keeping with my goals for myself that I have for Doodle. Stay out of your comfort zone.

Yeah, I know I already have so much that I do already and I am adding more stuff to my plate. I love my kid and I want her to have the same opportunities as a NT child. But she won't get there if I don't push her. No, I'm not gonna push someone else. My job is to push my child. Get my child to learn what she needs to learn. Practice, practice, practice. That's the key to meeting goals.

The saying in the autism community is, "You have to be taught something over a 1000 times before a child on the spectrum learns it". So there you go for how long it takes for your child to get where you can see change.

Today is New Years Eve and tomorrow is New Years Day. Start a visionary board on the goals that you want your child to reach. Just remember the hard work that you have to put in there to get them to that goal. Cause it takes teamwork to make that dream work.

See you all on the flip side and happy new year!

Happy Holidays, Autism

With Doodle being sick and now out of school. The days have been daunting. Add making a ton of pom poms for a craft I feel will never be finished and getting the same crud Doodle got. It's just not been fun.

Plus side is we are ready for the Holiday which is later in the morning. Doodle opened her Christmas Eve gift up and she fell asleep watching Dragons. She kept herself on schedule, which made me really happy.

So as of right now, she's out. I'm typing this while feeling like I'm having a hot flash. I hate this sore throat and congestion but my energy is finally coming back. And I'm not sleeping so much. So there is that.

Another note is the doctor's office mailed the mitts that I mentioned in a previous blog for when Doodle has meltdowns. So of course that has to now be handled with another IEP meeting. But not until the Holidays are over.

So from our family to yours, Happy Holidays! May your day be joyous and bright.

See you on the flip side.

You've got the fever, Autism

When a typical child gets sick it's easy for them to tell you what is wrong with them. But when you have a child on the spectrum get sick with limited speech, well that one is hard to figure out.

Doodle had her Christmas program at school. And she did very well but she wasn't herself. That morning before getting on the bus she was coughing and hacking up phlegm. Signs of an asthma issue. So she had to have a breathing treatment when she got to school.

During her program she wasn't her normal out of control self. But she did the program like a champ and I was so proud of her. I went to her when the show was over and gave her a kiss. And that's when I noticed, she felt like she was running a fever. So we headed to the nurses station. She was running a temp of 99.8. Time to check out of school and head home.

She's pretty much stayed in bed since she's been home. Her fever fluctuates from high 102.6 to 98.8 and she can't go back to school until she is fever free for 24 hours without the aide of of fever reducer. Doodle has requested soups and sprite during this time.

So far she has missed school on part of Wednesday and all of Thursday and at this point she's gonna miss Friday as well. I'm hoping that she will be well enough to go back to school on Monday and Tuesday. If not I will go to the school on the 18th and drop off the gifts for her classmates and pick up her treats and school shirt before coming home.

I hate that she's sick. And the only thing I can do is just treat the fever and cough. I know her throat hurts because the words she can say, her voice is having a hard time staying the octave that it's suppose to be.

Her fever did finally break on Saturday. Which means she's going back to school today and she is not pleased at all! She wants to stay home and watch the iPad. I'm ready for her to go back to school so I can get the last of Christmas taken care of.

Just two days, Doodle. That's all you have to worry about and the last day is a party so you will be fine! I still have to make sure her classmates get presents and treats and the teachers are taken care of too.

At least you have an update, though it's a short one because she is needing a lot of care and she's wanting to be cuddled. Which I don't mind as cuddling is not something she ever wants to do when she's well. I will take what I can get!

Bonus, I haven't gotten sick. So there's that!

See you on the flip side!

Revelations and IEP's Autism

As you all know I've had to do a few extra IEP's due to regression. Wasn't sure what was causing the regression and wasn't sure why she was going through meltdowns, which was something that was not normal for Doodle.

So there I was on Wednesday sitting in the IEP meeting with the Vice Principal and Transportation, the speech therapist, teacher and LEA. Doodle had two meltdowns on the bus last month and I would feel better knowing that my child is being well behaved and not cause issues putting the safety of the driver and the rest of the students in danger. So that round at the table went very well. Vice Principal was on board with trying to find the triggers. It the way I felt. She wasn't having meltdowns at home. And for Doodle to have meltdowns at school and on the bus. That's not normal of Doodle.

When the Speech therapist was going over her data of what Doodle could and could not say and the sounds she was having trouble with she turned to me and said, " You had a death in the family? I wanted to say that I'm sorry for your loss." And that's when it hit me. We didn't have a death in my household family. We had a death in my work family. My co-worker lost her battle with cancer. And Doodle adored her! Even renamed her Jasper. When Trish lost her battle that was the time the meltdowns started. This was Doodle's way of grieving.

I informed the speech therapist of this and asked our teacher if when she got my text about my co-worker passing if that was the time the meltdowns started. She said yes it was. The speech therapist informed me that when that text was sent that's the two days they couldn't get Doodle to even go to therapy.

It all made sense. Now we know how we can better help her. We can help her with her grief and we can help her with those meltdowns. Doodle's not great at articulation which is why we had to do the first IEP. And it didn't help that she was losing speech again. She is at a really good school and there is no reason for her to be losing speech. At this point I can honestly say it's not regression. And it's not tantrums, she's locking herself in her mind because she's trying to convey what is wrong but just can't. Doesn't understand how.

I know of a few parents that can't make their IEP's. To me I'd better be dead to miss one. Because if you are requesting something, you won't get it 9 times out of 10 if you miss the IEP meeting. But to me this IEP was an eye opening one. It took about a month from the first meeting requesting the extra data accumulation so we could try to find out the cause of the loss of speech and the meltdowns. To resolving the problem at the second IEP.

I'm a pretty strict parent when it comes to Doodle and I know to a lot of people I make raising a child on the spectrum look easy. It's my dedication to my daughter, all the excess classes and training to be able to better help her. It used to take over a hundred times teaching her something before she could actually learn something. Now it doesn't take that much. Schedules and calendar of events that help her to stay on task every moment of the day. To me I've got it down to being easy according to most. But it also takes a lot of prep the day before to make sure that everything is ready to go even if her routine changes.

I like to be laid back and easy going and that's not always the case when it comes to autism. But I get through it. There is always so much that has to be done. Her routine means that I have to be on routine. The magazine has to be done. My classes have to be planned. I'm learning a new art form and I'm learning animation again. My life stays busy with me just being a regular mom. But I want Doodle to be independent. And if the laundry fairy doesn't get the laundry done while she's at school, well that causes an issue. If her snack box isn't made, yeah that causes an issue. Even if the vacuum cleaner isn't where it's suppose to be anything can set off a meltdown at home. Which is one of the things I've been lucky enough to make sure is avoided at all cost.

I'm off to get more work done. Have to create templates for online classes that will be coming to my website in March or possibly April.

See you guys on the flip side.

Thanksgiving week Autism

It's Thanksgiving week and I have so much to do. Still working on the magazine and no where near the finish line and it doesn't help that Doodle is out of school for the week. That's gonna be interesting. She's gonna be so mad when she goes back to a communication book.

But this is what we are resorted to going back to since we are losing speech at an incredible rate. If you guys haven't seen the communication book I have posted in a previous blog that's what we are going back too. I will be updating it only because I want to incorporate her to use complete sentences.

This morning I will be dropping my vehicle off to be worked on.

Life with autism can be hard enough, add a free magazine and vehicle repair work to the mix and you have yourself a whole headache of work to do. Now throw in being a single mom and it's Thanksgiving week and you have barely anything to survive off of.

I am considering changing the magazine to be paid but that won't be for a couple of years. I don't want it to come to that but it might have to be done.

I'm going to keep this post short as I know of all the work I have to do this week to get everything finalized for the magazine.

See you guys on the flip side.

So much to be grateful for Autism

When it comes to autism, my child is going to be different from what your child is like. Not everyone has the same things wrong with them. We need to always remember that. Today we are celebrating Veterans Day and the kids are out of school to honor our veterans. I have a class tonight which means that my schedule will be off because my days will be off. Happens all the time when the kids are out of school.

I can't have Doodle just sitting on the iPad all day. She has to have some responsibility. She wanted to bathe the dog because Sunday I told her we were going to bathe the dog. And she wanted the gerbil cage cleaned cause yeah I opened my big mouth.

So if the dog is getting a bath then she's gonna have to pitch in and help. And she fought me on that one. I had her vacuum the floors and the dog bed while I washed the dogs blanket. Cause if the dog is getting a bath it means the dog gets clean blankets and a fresh bed vacuuming.

If the gerbil was getting it's cage cleaned that means my bed will need to be vacuumed. Because that's the easiest place for me to clean it's cage at. I have no idea why, it just is for me. Doodle can watch the gerbil and I can watch them both while cleaning the cage. Or at least pretend to watch them both cause I'm busy taking the cage apart and I don't have to worry about losing a cute little furry paper shredder.

Kids on the spectrum have to have chores. They have to have responsibility. They have to learn about self care and caring for what's important and that's where they live and being respectful by cleaning up their mess and helping to keep everything clean.

I have no issues with making sure my 12 year old knows how to make her bed, dress herself, though some days I'm sure I get the looks of how could you let your child out of the house dressed like that. Eh, I could care less. I have more important things to worry about other then what people think of me. 

As a parent of a child on the spectrum I am tired but only because I do so much. But I want to make sure that Doodle can live on her own and do for herself if it's ever going to be possible. I still have high hopes. I love my child and I want what's best for her and that means she has to learn something new every single day.

See you guys on the flip side.

Mental breaks Autism

There were many different things I could have spoken about today. But I will discuss why there was no post yesterday. In order to function as parents of children on the spectrum it's important to take time for yourself. I've discussed this in previous posts because it's one of the most important things for your sanity.

Look as parents we take on a lot and have to do a lot. There is no way around that. You are either an overachiever who is burning out quick or you are a parent who is already burnt out and have a lot on your plate that just keeps piling up.

So why was there no post yesterday? Because I was taking a much needed mental break. My best friend and I headed to the movies to watch Bohemian Rhapsody, while Doodle was in school. I still had work last night and still had things to do before Doodle left for school this morning. But that mental break is what I needed.

Long before Doodle could speak she was singing Queen songs. That was also covered in a previous blog to celebrate Freddie for a Day. We didn't have traditional speech but we did have words in song. And for that I am truly grateful.

I can't stress enough how important it is for a parent of a child with a disability to take mental breaks. It's also one of the things that I stress about the most at work. You can't be productive if you can't have a break. You can't do anything properly for yourself, your job or your child.

And though I have a child on the spectrum who has regressed and we are trying to get her back to the last good level of functioning, I can't help her if I can't think straight. She's finally sleeping through the night again. And I can get through the days without the burnt out feeling.

If you can't go see a movie at least get a mani pedi. You have to take care of you. That is the most important thing. Love yourself and you are able to love your life. Don't give up! You've got this.

See you on the flip side.

It's not broken Autism.

An update on what's going on.

Doodle was falling in a regression. I've had the iep and so far I am seeing a little improvement. Which as many of you know that's a good thing.

On Monday I went by the school to drop off supplies for the office and supplies for Science class and I fell trying to bring the supplies in the front door. I did have to head to urgent care to get checked out. It was my fault. I tried to take a step and my ankles said NOPE! Which lead to my fall.

I have sprained my wrist but I am okay. Great news is that it's not writing wrist. But even if it was I can switch hands when I need too. I can paint, draw and write with my left hand if I want too. But I'm mainly a righty. 

I will be back when I can fully type with both hands and my wrist is no longer hurting.

See you guys on the flip side.